
25 Jan Learn How to Manage Fear-Fueled Anger
Fear is a very powerful emotion that leads to other emotions. One such emotion is anger. When your anger is expressed in unhealthy ways, it can lead to behaviors that you regret. Learning to live a life without fear offers many positive benefits. One of those benefits is that living a life without fear helps to manage fear-fueled anger.
A Cycle of Anger and Fear
Fear is a powerful motivator. The emotion can be used to create hatred and anger toward someone or something, whether intentional or not. It unlocks the fight or flight mode within you. While fear tends to drive you away from whatever you are afraid of, it is just one shift away from the “fight” side of the fight or flight mode.
Once you have chosen to fight your fear, anger grows—anger that is intense, raw, and usually unchecked. Based on the fight or flight reaction, this emotional reaction has not been filtered through rational thought. There is even data and imaging that demonstrate how fear fuels anger within the brain. Fear-fueled anger can be like a wildfire, quickly burning out of control while our internal system is on high alert.
The Dangers of Expressing Anger in Unhealthy Ways
Like wildfire, unchecked anger that is expressed in unhealthy ways can lead to behaviors that cause regret. Words are said that cannot be taken back. Things get broken, people get hurt, and you may even have legal issues as a result of unchecked anger. People even lose loved ones. A partner may feel the need to leave for their safety. For their protection, the state may also remove children from your custody after anger has been expressed in unhealthy ways.
Eventually, a wildfire brings about a desolate, scorched, burned-out area, where nothing can live or survive until renewal occurs. Similarly, when you express anger in unhealthy ways, you may be left with a life that is empty and filled with regrets—a place where relationships cannot flourish until you can learn to manage your emotions better.
Removing Fear From Your Life
Living in fear can cause all kinds of problems for you. It is incredibly limiting and prevents you from living the life you deserve to live. When you have experienced fear-fueled anger, fear is that much more hazardous to your well-being. Whether you tried to escape your fears with substances or other destructive behaviors, those kinds of actions can literally be like adding fuel to the fire.
Living in fear involves avoiding the things that frighten you. By being willing to take action and face those fears, even just by taking baby steps, you remove the fear from your life. Confronting the things that you fear most about yourself, and facing the other things in your life that you fear will cause the fear to dissipate. As you take action toward the things you want in life, the fears slip away, and you are left with peace instead of fear and anger.
Living a Life Without Fear-Fueled Anger
When you choose to live your life without fear, you also choose to live your life without fear-fueled anger. This frees you up to live with fewer regrets and more freedom to enjoy the people and things you love. Imagine living in a beautiful meadow or forest that was no longer at the mercy of wildfires–that is similar to what living a life without fear-fueled anger can look like for you.
Living a life without fear does not mean that all of your anger goes away. Anger is a core emotion that everyone experiences. If anger management previously has been a struggle for you, there may still be some struggles ahead. However, by removing fear, you diminish the opportunities for anger, and give yourself more control over how you express your anger.
Managing Anger Becomes Easier Without Fear
When your anger is not fueled by the power of fear and the fight or flight mode, you are more likely to be able to use some common anger management techniques to control your anger, such as:
- Think before you speak
- Walk away from the situation for a few minutes
- Count backward from a number to calm yourself before you speak or act
- Use humor to relieve tension
- Engage in mindfulness or relaxation techniques to calm yourself
- Practice unlimited forgiveness
- Exercise to relieve tension
When anger is the singular emotion, you should be able to target it and manage it more successfully than when it is fueled by fear. Life is more manageable when you live without fear.